Paula Love's Happy Clients
_Paula gives you permission to think about the unthinkable and unspeakable. Once it's in the light, it's no longer unthinkable and unspeakable. I realized, as a result of working with her that everything that was most important to me was already present in my relationship. The simplicity, the painlessness of the process surprised me. What was missing in the relationship had to do with my not knowing how to access what I wanted. I needed to be more effective in my conversations with my husband. The work with Paula allowed me to be more of who I am. It affected not only my relationship with my husband, but all of my relationships.
—Sharon Machrone I truly believe I would not be married now if not for the work I did with Paula. I lived alone for 25 years, built my career. To say I am self-sufficient is an understatement. The process Paula uses really helped me to clarify what is important to me. As a result, I became much more centered around what I wanted in a relationship. When you know what you absolutely have to have, you can better determine someone else's ability to provide it. It's easier to protect what's important to you when you have a measurement to work with. Once I was comfortable that I could do that, I was able to let (my husband) in and I became a better partner.
Paula is an incredibly careful listener. She is very present. She can synthesize quickly, and she asks good questions. She knows how to ask hard questions in such a way that it takes the charge out of what might have felt like a big, heavy deal. She has a way of articulating things simply that suggests another way of looking at the issue. She created a lot of possibility in ways of looking at things. My husband and I are now having conversations that we weren't able to have before. Some things had seemed too dangerous to talk about. Working with Paula, something shifted and we were able to make things lighter, easier to look at. We laughed a lot. I'm making different requests now, and I'm more comfortable in bringing up my concerns. It's very satisfying.
—Peg Guerrieri Paula is wonderful. I particularly recommend her to business women who have put their personal lives on hold for their careers. The work with Paula benefits all relationships. I found I became more comfortable with the softer side of myself, and with letting other people see who I really am.
—Chris Kramer Paula's approach is very effective. She asks questions you don't think to ask of yourself. They elicit a kind of map that guides you to where you'd like to be. And, sometimes, it's the way she asks the question that shifts your understanding. In answering her questions, you begin to see things differently. As a result of working with Paula, my partner and I were able to have a huge shift in our accountability to one another, and we purchased a home, something that didn't seem workable before. We saw that our different approaches, ways of doing things, were actually a very good combination. In resolving our concerns, we were able to experience a sense of abundance about a shared future, the ownership of something that could produce a lot of security, versus a sense of burden of responsibility and scarcity. Part of life is the inevitability of breakdown, and there are key breakdowns in what it means to be a couple, generally relating to issues of trust. There are so few role models or guidelines for making relationships work. Most people get stuck trying to fix themselves, one another, or trying to have someone else fix them.
—Steve Gibson Most of us have very little training in the area of relationship. We learn in therapy the "why" of what has been happening; Paula's work is far more practical. She coaches in "the how" -- how to put practices in place and to observe ourselves and others with greater clarity in order to have more choice and create change. As a result of working with her, I have greater skill in assessing what's critical for me. It's very powerful.
After years of feeling lonely and disappointed, I realized that the fact that I did not have the relationship I wanted had to do with my own competence. I decided to work with Paula to identify areas of learning so I could be more effective creating the satisfying, sustainable relationship I wanted. Paula really understands the nature of learning. I worked with Paula over a period of three and a half years, and I am now in a wonderful relationship. Working with Paula has been a wonderful experience. She is able to be truly compassionate about where you are, including where you are most awkward and most blind. As a result, you can go from feeling inept and uncomfortable to feeling like you can learn to make a move and have it work very quickly. Lots and lots of people suffer in the matter of relationship. For most of them, there's very little they can do about it. Therapy doesn't help, because although they may learn more about why things are happening, there's little support in the area of taking new actions. Meeting someone new won't help. Working with Paula, people can take new actions, so they can create different results.
—Marsha Shenk Paula is nurturing, insightful and brilliant at what she does. I am very delighted she is in the world doing her work. It's really, really important work. When you consider the suffering we inflict on ourselves and each other, it is critical to know that there is a way to learn about relationship. We can learn to treat each other in ways that will allow us to thrive.
—Paulina Mustazza Paula helped me find my voice both in personal and business relationships and help understand and get beyond my fears and anxiety, fostering essential communication skills.
—D. Keller Paula gave me perhaps the greatest gift any human being could give another: she helped me develop the ability to be in a healthy, happy, loving relationship. When I began seeing her I was already pretty "smart" about personal growth and had done a lot of therapy, workshops, and training. I was in a good relationship and I knew it, but I still had a lot of hesitations and sticking points around my own expectations, fears, and concerns. Paula taught me how to communicate about sensitive issues in ways that connected me more deeply to my partner, which helped me address those concerns and move beyond them. I feel so lucky to be with my man - I honestly never knew it could be this good!!! And I am quite certain that I never would have gotten to this place without Paula's help.
—Mandy Paula is an extraordinary resource for anyone who wants to have fulfilling relationships. Her depth of expertise, her wise and compassionate heart, and her brilliant application of embodiment offers results that simply don’t exist in the world of good advice. I send everyone I know to her.
—Victoria Paula Love has been my coach since 2009. She has helped me navigate with dignity and strength many challenging relationship situations – both personal and professional. Paula's voice is the voice in my head these days whenever I face a relational issue. Thanks to her coaching, I stay centered, aware, curious , and clear as I choose the right action in each moment. The culmination of the many new actions I've taken with her help has brought me the love of my life, an amazing blended family full of love, respect and appreciation, productive and fulfilling work, and joy. I never knew life was meant to be lived like this!
—Kathleen E. Loehr I was in a spiral in my relationships. Unhappy, ineffective and emotionally blocked even though I had done years of therapy. I was encouraged to start working with Paula. I was surprised at how quickly trust and rapport was established even though we mostly worked via Skype. Paula's ability to hold an emotional space where truth can be surface, her deep insights, and profound LACK of judgment is truly astounding. I have been able to, quickly, get to many of the core issues that had previously eluded me and take effective action to change both my internal response and my behavior. This led me to be able to identify those few 'must haves' in an intimate relationship. The non-negotiables that I now have the self-esteem to stand up for. All this in less than a year...I am a work in-progress and, through my work with Paula, look forward to embracing the essence of who I am in this world.
Paula came highly recommended by a trusted friend, after I shared my concerns about my relationship with my partner of 15+ years. I had worked with a therapist previously which had not felt helpful or supportive. Within one phone conversation with Paula, I knew that I had found someone who would support me and help me discover new insights about myself and my relationship strategies. During my engagement with Paula, I can easily say that I learned more about relationships than I ever knew before in my adult life. I grew in my intentionality, as well as what I really needed (and deserved) in my partnership. Paula really knows the territory of relationships, and I highly recommend her as a coach and resource. —Kathleen |